Computer dating, bill paying, voting: Are we really in control of our lives?

Those of us looking for love in the year 2009 find ourselves sitting behind our computers keying in all the vital information about who we are and who we are looking for, so that IT can match us with someone with whom we have similar preferences, lifestyles, and beliefs. Oh yes, I know this has proven successful for many people, including some friends of mine, but what would you do if one evening you met a person who was your exact opposite in many ways, but you were attracted anyway? Would you consider it absurd to go against the formula and follow your heart’s illogicality, believing that such relationship is ultimately doomed? Are you more comfortable allowing IT to define your choices?

Similarly, bill paying is now done by many of us by simply pressing a few buttons on a computer whenever and wherever we wish. You don’t have to pick up a pen and write a check or get a stamp and mail the envelope -- with our busy schedules, that takes too much time and effort. But have you ever had a payment get lost or tried to retrieve one after you hit “send” hastily? Do you realize you are exposing your hard-earned money pot to many hands, none of whom need ever take the blame for a delayed posting, a late fee, or missing funds?

And now computerized voting machines are coming to a polling station near you. How many times can the analysts and the independent investigators and even the hackers themselves warn us of the impending danger? Unfortunately, I fear this is going to be another case of too little too late when, again, the Republicans deny there is any problem, the Liberals will go on and on about the defects in the system and will be dismissed as over-zealous rabble-rousers, and the Democrats will sit idly by confused by all the rhetoric and once again victimized by their own inaction.

Now tell me, are we really in control of our lives or is it that we are, for the moment, being given a simple pass by those really in control -- the industrialists, the government, and the thieves -- to continue in our usual routines, authorizing a faceless entity to conduct business for us, until one day a spin of the Wheel of Misfortune points to us and causes us concern? Then will we listen to our instincts if, in fact, they are even still trying to guide us?

Unfortunately, it seems that when something doesn’t cause trouble in our own backyards, it appears unreal to us, and we wonder if the victims aren’t making more out of a problem than really exists. We may become models of concern and outrage, and talk a good game about what needs to be done to change things, but then sit back and allow “they” and “them” to take care of things. Only when we are affected directly and experience inconvenience and loss ourselves, do most of us question the accuracy and legitimacy of the system.

Mind you, it’s not that I don’t believe in growth and progress; I just believe some things deserve a more qualified, personal touch. People, when you turn your lives over to a computer – whether it be emotionally, financially or politically -- you relinquish your power to virtual strangers which you trust to negotiate in your best interests, when most of us don’t even trust our neighbors or loved ones! Is it because we are lazy? Too insecure about our own capabilities? Believe all the lies told to us by greedy capitalists? Afraid to make the wrong decision? I say, all of the above.

Despite what I and those like me have to say, I expect technology and cyberspace will continue to take over everything. (I mean, cars can now parallel park themselves – does that mean that future drivers won’t even have to learn how?!). We will continue to be introduced to new, time-saving, cost-effective programs and gadgets that promise to make our hectic lives easier, just like this latest one: a new and improved, easy, no-mess, speedy, low fat, paperless, democracy.


Audrey Valeriani is a local author, freelance writer, host of www.TheAccidentalExpert.com, and relationship expert for www.TheSpotter.net.

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